LAUGHTER
I think we could do with something to cheer us up after the previous pages!

The man passed out in a dead faint as he came out of his front door onto the porch. Someone called 999. When the paramedics arrived, they helped him regain consciousness and asked if he knew what caused him to faint. "It was enough to make anybody faint," he said, "My son asked me for the keys to the garage, and instead of driving the car out, he came out with the lawn mower!"

A lawyer dies and meets St Peter at the Pearly Gates. He grabs St Peter by the robes and insists there's been some kind of mistake. "I'm too young to die!" he yells. "I'm only 38 years old!" St Peter takes the lawyer's hands off him, straightens his robes, and consults the Book of Life "I think I've found the problem," he says, "Judging by the number of hours you've billed your clients for, we thought you were 82."

The young man invited his new girl-friend to a family dinner at his uncle and aunt's house. She was very self-conscious but eager to make a good impression. The meal came to an end without any mis-hap on her part. The as the table was cleared before dessert, she asked if she should keep her spoon. All was quiet as the host eyed the young girl solemnly. "I don't know about that," he replied. "It's part of a set."


E-ROUND NEWS
November 7th 2002
ANGLICAN/METHODIST DEBATE.
An important consultation process is underway to gain views across the diocese on proposals to bring closer together the Church of England and the Methodist Church. It follows overwhelming support at Diocesan Synod for taking forward the proposed national 'Anglican-Methodist Covenant' - a mutual affirmation of the life and ministry of each other's churches. Consultation meetings will be held in each of the diocese's three Archdeaconry areas - St Albans, Hertford and Bedford - in February or March, and Deanery Synods are being encouraged to debate the issue.

SCHOOLS SPARKLE.
Around 700 pupils from 35 church schools took part in a dazzling Festival at St Albans Cathedral to celebrate the 125th anniversary of the diocese's founding. The Festival - held on All Saints' Day, November 1st - focused on the theme of Light, and featured a new work by composer Chris Hazell. An art exhibition on the theme 'Light throughout the Bible' accompanied the event.

WELCOMES.
The installation of the Revd Helen Cunliffe as Archdeacon of St Albans will take place at Evensong in St Albans Cathedral on Saturday January 11th at 4 pm. The commissioning and welcoming service for the new Bishop of Bedford, the Ven.Richard Inwood, will be on Saturday March 8th 2003 at St Paul's Bedford, at 5 pm. His consecration service is at Southwark Cathedral the previous day.

DIRECTORY.
The 2003 edition of the St Albans Diocesan Directory is now published. The new edition also includes parish websites and e-mail addresses. The cost is £6, including postage. To purchase, send a cheque payable to 'St Albans Diocesan Board of Finance' to Diocesan Directory, St Albans Diocesan Office, Holywell Lodge, 41 Holywell Hill, St Albans, Herts, AL1 1HE.

BUSHMEAD.
The congregation at Christchurch, Bushmead, Luton hope to be in their new church for Christmas. Work began in June, and the church - to serve more than 1,000 new homes in the area - is fast taking shape. More than 60 churches have supported the project with financial gifts. The Bishop of St Albans, the Rt Revd Christopher Herbert, is due to open the new church building on Friday January 24th.Peter Crumpler, Communications Officer
Diocese of St. Albans,
Tel: 01727 869506; Fax 01727 844469
pcrumpler@stalbans.anglican.org

Christmas shop is still open selling
candles (from £1) pot pourri, £1.90 bag
Christmas arrangements and other ideas
for Christmas presents. Contact:-
Hilary McDonald
9 Crawley Close, Slip End
01582 411573


CHRISTMAS IS COMING
ITEMS FOR CHRISTMAS NOW ON SALE - CRAFT ITEMS INCLUDING FABRIC, CHRISTMAS CAROL BOOKS, FABRIC PLACEMATS, CHRISTMAS STOCKINGS, ORDERS FOR CHRISTMAS CAKES AND PUDDINGS, ORDERS FOR CANDLE AND FLOWER ARRANGEMENTS FOR THE CHRISTMAS TABLE.

HARPENDEN W.I. MARKET
NEXT TO WH SMITHS-
HIGH STREET, HARPENDEN
EVERY FRIDAY 9.00 AM - 11.30 AM


Alpha Course

Alpha starts on 15th January 2003
with an Alpha Supper. If you feel the
Lord is calling you to get involved,
particularly with regard to becoming
a leader, or offering your home as a
meeting place, please speak to Sue
Wiltshire (co-ordinator) on 725984


OPERATION CHRISTMAS CHILD
There is a lot to report this month and November has been a very busy but productive time. Teresa Willson (ably assisted by husband Tony) thought long and hard but thankfully decided to become the co-ordinator for the Luton District and arrange for the collection and packing of shoe-boxes from all over Luton and Dunstable. Their garage was turned into a mini warehouse for checking and packing boxes with fantastic results.
We had been invited to visit the warehouse at Chelmsford and to meet up with Sheila Heaton, the area organiser for this area who came to St Andrew's in February to talk to us about the good work Samaritans Purse do, and what happens to all the shoe-boxes when they leave the United Kingdom. On November 13th Tony in his van full of cartons bound for Chelmsford and Teresa, Brenda McMichael, Gill Downs and myself (Sue Cowell) set off. We had a long tiring journey due to hold-ups and traffic jams but finally arrived at the enormous warehouse that the organisation has been given rent-free until the middle of December. We met with Sheila who introduced us to her warehouse manager Bob Hardy, who has been helping with his wife for the last six years and he arranged to show us around the huge operation. They have about 50 volunteers who all work different shifts, checking and packing all the boxes that arrive. There is a line of tables complete with fillers that have been donated, for boxes that do not have much in, then a line of ladies checking there for liquids or dangerous articles in the boxes and who remove the £2 postage. The boxes are passed to the next row for sealing and put on the correct pallet for that age group and finally an experienced packer puts about 16/17 boxes into a large carton which is sealed ready for its long trip abroad. There is a special corner for Colin Ridgewell, the joint area organiser who sends out donations of clothes, shoes and large cuddly toys along with the shoe-boxes. We were amazed at the scale of the operation but it was extremely rewarding and who knows - next year, Teresa and Tony could be on the look-out for much larger premises for this area, so if you do hear of any vacant premises that might be suitable please bear it in mind. Trucks have already left Chelmsford bound for Romania and Odessa, in the Ukraine with some of our boxes, and on 6th December there is a truck bound for Russia, which will include more from this area.
Special thanks to all who gave shoe-boxes and helped with checking and packing. It has been very rewarding for all concerned. We pray that all the children receiving a box this Christmas with be delighted with them.
Teresa is indebted to Tony (Mr Shifter, Warehouse Manager), and the following volunteers; Val Church, Sue Cowell, Janet Cooper, Fran Dibley, Mandy Dowl, Gill Downs (for helping with collections also), Jilly Harvey, (Welwyn area), Brenda McMichael, Ann O'Hara, Angela Searle-Barnes and Natalie Worsley, Also to all those people who offered help, (Chris Allsop, Linda Bartlett), Freda Sidebottom who contributed bags full of baby and children's knitted clothes and knitted teddies and to Margaret Foster who collected from schools and churches in Luton.
Just some of the organisations and people who have donated boxes as follows - if it wasn't for all of you, we wouldn't have reached the amazing number of 2334, at time of press, just for this area.
St Andrews Church, Slip End School, Brownies, Cubs, Womens Institute, Streetfield School, Five Oaks School, Heathfield School, St Marys RC Lower School, Schools from Luton and Dunstable, Birchwood Methodist Church in Hatfield, The ladies of Markyate through Doris Green (thanks mum), and Bupa Hospital in Harpenden. Thank you too to the people who just bought boxes along. God bless you all and don't forget to think of all the happy children opening their boxes this Christmas time. Sue Cowell,Editor
Following are just some of the photos taken:


Mr Shifter, Tony with one of the collections



The large warehouse loaned to Samaritans Purse for approx 6 weeks


Gill & Brenda at the warehouse


Brenda & Reg from Birchwood Methodist


Some of the ladies checking the boxes at the warehouse.



Just some of the boxes ready for checking and packing



Different rows of the operation



Teresa and Val in the garage - slightly
smaller than the warehouse!!


Tony gets all the information from Bob and
some tips for next year!


Some of the boxes collected by Doris Green of Markyate - mostly from OAP's


Some of the Boxes from Slip End School


Boxes from West Street School


An overloaded Brownie!


Some help from the brownies and ZJB with boxes from St Andrew's


A POEM FOR THE FAMILY

Families

Some families are big,
some families are small
But no matter what size
It's the same for them all.

Families are fathers, that frown and say
"We didn't do things like that in my day!
That shirt's rather bright, that skirt's far too tight
Now tell me again where you're going tonight."

Families are mothers, who flap and fuss
"Hurry up now or you'll miss the school bus!
Straighten your tie, tidy your hair
Are you sure those big ear-rings are what you can wear?"

Families are brothers, that joke and tease
And when you're not looking they give you a squeeze
They think they're much bigger and better than you,
And far more important in all that they do.

Families are sisters who share all your things,
Your bedroom your records, your bracelets and rings.
They use all your perfume and ladder your tights
Then keep your awake playing music at night.

But God's family's a unit where we all belong
He supports us in trouble when things have gone wrong.
He shares in our gladness our sadness and fears
He loves us and cares for us through all of the years.


EDITORS CHOICE

Christmastime

What does Christmas mean to us,
Does it mean a lot of fuss?
Gifts to buy and cards to write,
A Christmas tree with candles bright,
A turkey plump, mince pies to bake;
With outward signs we all partake.
We rush around, no time to pray,
"Oh that can wait another day."
But stop awhile, just think it out
What Christmas Day is all about,
The day a tiny child was born,
In stable bare, and so forlorn.
The King of Kings who reigns above
Came down to bless us with his love.
by Patience Strong

 


EDITORS PLEA TO SUBSCRIBERS
As this is the last Parish News of the year I thought I would ask some of our contributors for their help. If possible, could we have any news, posters, adverts and dates for the diary typed, and either e-mailed or sent on a floppy disc. It gets very hectic around the end of the month especially with late-comers (also a plea for entries to be on time) and if the details are hand-written they have to be typed first and then inserted into the Parish News. All the work that is done for the Parish News is voluntary and if you are working, time is very limited. Perhaps there is someone who might enjoy a bit of typing practice, so if all the clubs, groups etc. could ask around their members, it would be much appreciated. Discs can be supplied if necessary.
Don't forget, we have a month off in January to recuperate from the year so the next edition will be February 2003. Finally, all the Parish News team would like to wish their readers a very happy Christmas and a healthy, peaceful New Year.
Sue Cowell, Editor


Never a Christmas morning,
Never the old year ends
But somebody thinks
of somebody
Old days, old times, old friends


Village Diary


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