I am back again after missing one month. I was away for a few days last week so missed this months meeting. I have however enquired as to what was discussed and as usual not a great deal.(I will most probably get told off for that remark but it just slipped out).Still I suppose I do complain a lot so deserve what I get.
I did notice that a few more security lights have been added to the car park and are all working very well, so watch out you young ones as you can be seen more clearly. I also noticed that the weeds have been broken down with just a few more to get rid of. and it keeps the car park and surroundings looking very smart. I have been asked if I could mention in the magazine about the dreadful noise from an activity that took place in the Peter Edwards Hall a few weeks ago. I even had friends phone me from Farley Hill to ask if I knew what it was all about. I personally did not hear a thing but at the time I know that the poor old residents in the Woodside home had a most dreadful time. I also understand that the persons who hired the hall did clear up inside but not the streets which didn't do justice to a booking at a nice hall and our village. I was rather pleased that it didn't take place in the village hall of which I am part of the committee or we would never have got away with it. I have heard today that it was a Caribbean evening so of course one would expect noise from the wonderful music that they play so lets hope next time the lettings secretary, whoever it is, will discover what the event is to prevent my being stopped and asked to write about it, although I did say I will have to be careful what I write about in this day and age, but however, as much as I am trying to pass on the messages for those who don't send in a line or two themselves about that evening I would have loved the music of the brass drums. 
Now that is out of the way I would like to mention about the £1000 that Caddington Council gave Slip End Council when they became two separate parish council's to update the small gardens at the corner of the cross roads called coronation gardens. Apparently it was given in 2001 and we haven't been able to find a designer or what ever one calls them, so if there are any landscape gardeners about let the village know. Wouldn't it be nice to be part of the village recommendations ???
Can anyone enlighten me as to why we have part paths down the road near the sleeping policemen (well that's my version of them) are they for decorative purposes to make the entrance to the village look more classy or just to use up a bit of money that could be used for other things? 
It would be beneficial if we could have something done about New street and Front street where you cannot see the cars coming towards New street from the cross roads. There are cars on the corner and several people have had nasty knocks to their cars whilst trying to drive out of New Street,
Also Markyate Road is the fastest road in the county and needs something done art once. Is there any money left in the kitty to sort out the speed camera that I talk about? Never mind paths that one has to get on the road then off again. Lets get something sensible done in the village. I myself cannot do a thing about these suggestions as I am not a Parish Counciller but if I was I would do my utmost to help you all
If you are going on holiday any of you have a nice time and ill be back next month.

Meet outside Church at 2.30pm 
2nd Sunday of the month.
July 13th Redbournbury Mill 3 miles
Aug 10th Wingfield 3½ miles
Sep 14th Potten End 2¼ miles
Oct 12th Northchurch 3 miles
Nov 9th Whipsnade 3 miles
Dec 14th Ayot St Lawrence 2 miles

Sue Wiltshire

Some photos from the visit on May 10th to "The Home" of Mother's Union and to Westminster Abbey. (as stated in last months Parish News)
Thanks to Edie Ham who luckily had her camera with her for the trip.

As we approached Westminster Abbey, we were greeted by Morris Dancers. 

Mary Sumner House and a favourite place was the lovely peaceful Chapel, 

Eileen tries out the Presidents chair for size!

Mary, Dot and Sue have a brief rest in
one of the committee rooms.

LAUGHTER                Click Here To See The Joke Section!
At the tender age of fourteen the young student began his first part-time job. On his first night he took an order for steak and as he headed for the kitchen the customer shouted after him, "Well done!" He turned round and thanked the customer, proud of having done such a good job.

When the school leaver arrived for a job interview at the supermarket, she realised that she had forgotten to wear her contact lenses. Undaunted, she went ahead, confident that she would get the job, courtesy of an interview technique recommended by some friends. She was advised to smile at all times and to employ the term "sir" when addressing the manager. Unfortunately, the ploy didn't work. In fact, it seemed that the more she smiled and said "sir" the grimmer the interviewer became. The interview ended when the boss suddenly arose and opened the door. "Don't call us," she said coldly, smoothing down her skirt. "We'll call you."

The parents of a 16 year old son instructed him to pull up the weeds from the vegetable patch whilst they were at work. He was to leave nothing behind. When they returned home, they went into the garden to collect some fresh vegetables for their evening meal. Every last weed was gone. But so were the peas, the carrots, the radishes…….


I would like to say thank you to everybody who supported my recent plant sale, by coming, by contributing plants, and for helping on the day.

A profit of £280 was made which has been put towards the church roof repair fund.

Next year the Plant People will be back in action. Another Open Gardens Day is planned. In January we will be asking for volunteers to open their gardens later in the year. So, if you are interested, please watch this space.

Valerie Church

The Playgroup AGM was in May and we coupled this with an American Supper for all to enjoy. Our thanks went to outgoing Chair Jayne for all her work for the group over the last few years. Her place is taken by Tricia who is already well into the swing of things and doing a great job.

This term the children have learned about shapes and also living things. We have 'grown' our own tadpoles into frogs and on the day I write this one of our butterflies has emerged from its cocoon.
We are holding our Sponsored Fun Run on Monday 30th June - weather permitting- running around the children's playground. We are hoping for lots of support from Mums, Dads, Grandparents etc to cheer us on our way. Some of the money we raise will be used to fund our trip to Woodside Wild Fowl Park which is scheduled for Friday 11th July. We plan to make this a family occasion so parents and younger brothers and sisters who are not at school can come too.

The end of our term is 18th July by which time we hope that Sue and Julie have received official confirmation that they have achieved their NVQ 3 in Childcare and Education. They have worked extremely hard on this during the year and I can feel a celebration coming on to mark their success. 
Jill Acton


A student at interview for a university philosophy course is seated at a square coffee table and asked 'how many legs has this table?' He answers 'four'. 
'From where you are sitting, you can only see three legs, so what makes you think there are four?' 
A lengthy philosophical discussion follows and, at the end of the interview, the student is asked to take a good look round the table. It has only three legs! 
(apologies to Tony Blair!).

Why are buildings called buildings when they are finished? Shouldn't they be called builts? 
Why is abbreviated such a long word? 
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
Why is it that when you tell a man there are 400 billion stars he will believe you, but when you tell him there's wet paint he has to touch it? 
What would Geronimo say if he jumped out of an airplane?
What do you call a male ladybird?
What hair colour do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?
If your supermarket is lowering prices every day, how come nothing is free yet?
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
If a firefighter fights fire and a crime fighter fights crime, what does a freedom 
fighter fight?
Whose cruel idea was it to put a 'S' in 'lisp'? 
Do you find it unnerving that what doctors do is called 'practice'? 
Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

(let me know if you have any more - Editor)

Below are the dates for the meetings for the next year at the Village Hall.

7th July 03 
1st September 03 
6th October 03 
3rd November 03 
1st December 03 
5th January 04
2nd February 04
2nd March 04
5th April 04
10th May 04

The meetings are open to the public and questions / issues can be raised at the end of each meeting. 

A County Councillor, District Councillor and sometimes a representative from the Police Force are also at the meetings.
Generally the meetings will last for approximately two hours.

Our Lent Smartie Tubes were filled with money for war refuges. £137 was sent to Christian Aid. Sunday school children filled there Lent Smartie Tubes for Children's Village and £44 was given to them.
Thank you to everyone who bought cakes from our stall outside the Co-op in May, £109 was raised for Church funds.
There will be an All-Age worship on July 20th, led by Robin Wright, everyone is welcome to come. Tea coffee and biscuits will be served after the service.
Our Sunday school will be breaking up for the summer holidays from July 20th and will re-open on Sunday 7th September at 11 am. Our Church services at 11 lam will continue threw out the summer except on Bank holiday Sunday (24th August) when we will be having the Christening service of Amy Florance Richardson in the afternoon.
Dates for your Diary
September 14th 11:00am Harvest festival
September 15th 7:30pm Harvest auction
September 21st at 11:00 am All age worship led by The Live Circuit Players. 
During September there will be a door to door collection for NCH. 
October 11th 2:30pm The Autumn fayre
As the holiday season is once again approaching, we at Aley Green wish those you going away a happy and enjoyable time. We pray that you return relaxed and rested.
Ann Meader

It's good to be back at Cub's after a break of 5 months on health grounds. 
The district commissioner and his team ran the pack, very successfully, from 
Christmas until June in my absence.
Since my return, We have had a few fun evenings, games and I'm a Cub Scout, 
Get me out of here!

14th, 15th of June was a district camp held at Woburn and it was enjoyed by 
all. Lots of water activities and plenty of sunshine. The boys were able 
to do a lot of Scouting skills on this camp as they had two nights under 
canvas. Only another three nights and they can gain their campers badge.

Lorraine Crossett

As this is written, we are looking forward to the School Fete on 28th June, in the hope that the good weather continues and we have a successful afternoon.
FOSELS (Friends of Slip End Lower School) hold several fund raising events throughout the year so that they may buy those little and BIG extras for the pupils at the school. Recently they have purchased blue and red desks and chairs for the whole school to replace the grey equipment. The new tables and chairs have made the classrooms a lot brighter. The fund raising carried out by the 'Friends' is very much appreciated by the Children, Staff and Governors.
So the school still has redundant grey tables and chairs; they are up for sale if you would like one or two or three………… Tables, either rectangular or trapezoidal, are £5 each and chairs are £1 each. The tables are durable and could be used in your shed, for your grandchildren to play on or do their homework. If you are interested in purchasing any of the tables and chairs please enquire at the school ('phone 720152).
At the end of April, the pupils at the school were entertained by the Bedfordshire Youth Theatre with a performance of 'Revolting Rhymes' by Roald Dahl. I couldn't get to the performance but I'm told the children thoroughly enjoyed the show.
Our picture this month is the display in the school foyer; this display is changed on a regular basis to reflect the seasons and festivals.

Summertime Security

Don't let your long-awaited escape t o the sun turn into a holiday from hell. The warning comes from police as many householders in Mid and South Beds prepare for their annual summer holiday - but forget to think about the security of their home while they are away.

Now Crime Reduction Officer P.c. Dave Rollings has produced an eight point plan for residents to follow to reduce their chances of being burgled. All householders should consider the following;-

1. Ensure all windows and doors are locked, outdoor security lighting works and any alarms are set.
2. Remember to cancel the milk and newspapers.
3. Put lights, and even radios, on timers to give the illusion someone is in.
4. Leave curtains half drawn, rather than fully open or fully shut.
5. Check garages and other outbuildings are secure.
6. Repair any gaps in fences or walls.
7. Mark valuables with postcodes and note serial numbers of expensive items like TVs, videos and hi-fis.
8. If possible, ask a trusted neighbour to remove free newspapers and leaflets, water hanging baskets and tubs, open and close curtains and leave their car in your drive.

Most burglars are opportunists and if it is obvious a house is empty, and security is poor, it is the first one in a street they will target. A friendly neighbour or fellow home watch member can be an enormous help in making your home looks lived in. 

It's not just those caught up in the euphoria of going on holiday who let security slip, those of us at home tend when the good weather is upon us to leave doors, and windows wide open - remember Lock up or Lose it!

Crime Prevention advice is available from PC Rollings on 01582 473273

(There has already been one recent burglary from a house in Slip End that wasn't secure -
don 't let it happen to you!!!) 

The code of the road- (for all drivers)

I vow today to go my way, determined not to speed.
This day right now I take the vow that I will always heed
the regulations of the road; the signals and the lights
Keeping in my mind the thought of other people's rights.
Selfishness and recklessness may lead me to a smash
Causing death or even worse, all in a moment's flash.
Is it worth the risk to gain a minute or a mile,
Thinking in my folly that I'm driving in fine style?
Lack of thought for other drivers might well prove to be
A perilous and most expensive business for me.
So on this and every day I vow to keep the code,
And do my own small bit towards the safety of the road.

Wear a smile

A little smile works wonders, enhancing charm and looks.
And though you may not see it in the beauty books - 
It's a tip worth having. You'll take it if you're wise.
It banishes the wrinkles and lights the tired eyes.
You may make every effort to dress in perfect style -
But it will all be wasted unless you wear a smile.
(some poems from Patience Strong)

Tips and Wrinkles

I found a very interesting book on one of my recent trips to the Charity Shop and thought I would share some of the tips inside it with the Parish News. If you have any of your own to share, I'll be pleased to print your ideas.

Around the house:
A paperclip by the central fold will prevent a newspaper falling apart.
Place a small button at the start of your sellotape roll; it will be easier to find the beginning and the button easily removed.
To keep your glasses clean and clear, rinse them in clear hot water every morning as you wash.
To make your candles last longer, place in the freezer for a few hours before use.
Make friends with your clothes pegs! Use them for numerous other little jobs - securing open grocery packets, closing a polythene bag with food inside for the fridge, clipping together shopping lists or other papers.

Look out for more next month - Editor

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there are bulletin boards, forums, pictures and other items, all of local interest.
Articles for the August issue of Parish News should be passed, by 15th July
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Village Diary